McDonald's (East and West Cybersland)/History

The first Cyberslandian McDonald's opened in in October 1982. Until said month in said year, McDonald's was banned from opening a location in both Cyberslands (due to health reasons). John Sprinkles, the man who had the ban put in place, learned from his mistake and became head of the Cyberslandian unit.

The first branch was (and still is) located next door to the Beach Souvenir Shop of Beach Klaxon in Beach Klaxon, West Cybersland. In the wake of a controversy over importing French fries to the Cyberslands, McDonald's Corporation had CyberBurger Restaurants, Inc. build a plant to manufacture french fry ingreidents in the Cyberslands at a cost of $5 million US. Some branches are kosher, because of the large Hebrew population in the region of New Tel Aviv, West Cybersland.

In the same year, the Cyberslandian division created what they call a "Happy Kids" meal, which contains a main item (typically a hamburger, cheeseburger, or small serving of Chicken McNuggets), a side item (french fries, apple slices, or a macaron), and a drink (milk, juice, or a soft drink). John Sprinkles gave mentions to roving reporter Zack Brickham of WCT1 News that planned names for the Happy Kids meal were "Little Feast", "Bag for Juniors", and "Junior Lunch".

In 1994, the Tau/Cybersland Border Junction Station branch aroused controversy when the restaurant installed a McDonald's sign in front of TNR #2929 (the first EMD SD40-2 to arrive in Tau, in 1980). Bereaved families and railroad historians claimed this blocked the famous SD40-2. The sign was later moved to the parking lot of said train station.

In 1995, gangsters from Sunnyville attacked the Beach Klaxon location, knocking over cash registers and setting the playplace on fire. However, an employee tackled them, and put out the fire. The gangsters were later arrested and the playplace and cash registers were repaired. One of the gangsters currently works as a frycook at the Beach Klaxon location. By coincidence, a McDonald's now occupies the gangsters' base.

In May 1996, McDonald's introduced the Arch Deluxe and on September 26, 1996, McDonald's introduced the Crispy Chicken Deluxe, the Grilled Chicken Deluxe, and the Fish Filet Deluxe to replace the McChicken, the McGrilled Chicken Classic, and the Filet-O-Fish (all three latter sandwiches were brought back on January 1, 1998). Also, on September 26, 1996, McDonald's in East and West Cybersland ended its relationship with Coca-Cola, opting to sell Pepsi products instead.

From 1996 to 1998, McDonald's restaurants sold the Triple Cheeseburger, a sandwhich with three beef patties and three cheese slices. To promote the sandwhich, a edited version of a McDonald's commercial that aired in Austraila in the late 90's (using the "Good food, great prices" branding instead of the "Only McDonald's" branding and with the Austrailan voice-over redubbed by US sport commentator Scott Douglas) (the original version can be seen here) aired on television screens across East and West Cybersland. It was brought back later on in 1998 as a permanent menu item as part of the "Food's hot and ready!" branding. In 2003, the sandwich had it's first commercial in years, featuring videos of people having fun and videos of the sandwhich.

On September 21, 1996, a McDonald's restaurant in Cigarette Land, East Cybersland removed French Fries and other side items from its menu and that restaurant replaced the side items with brand cigarettes and cigars, as part of a lifetime agreement that this restaurant signed with cigarette companies. Also, on that day, that restaurant ended its relationship with Coca-Cola and (under lifetime agreements signed with beer and liquor companies) began selling beers, rye whiskeys, wines, spirits, vodkas, tequilas, rums, and ales. The McDonald's in Cigarette Land, East Cybersland still serves cigarettes, cigars, and electronic cigarettes (they are sold only in boxes at this restaurant) as side items and beers, rye whiskeys, wines, spirits, vodkas, tequilas, rums, and ales (they are sold only in bottles and cans at this restaurant) as drinks as of July 2014. Starting on January 1, 1997, some McDonald's locations in the Central Plains region of the United States (Nebraska, Iowa, Kansas, and Missouri) replaced their fries and drinks with cigarette, beer, and liquor products. They still sell cigarettes and beer as of July 12, 2014.

McDonald's of the Cyberslands and The Walt Disney Company of the Cyberslands had worked together in the 1980s until disagreements flared up over some of McDonald’s promotions like offering bargain videotapes of recent movies. Hungry Jack's was more than eager to step in, and its Lion King promotion for Disney was a phenomenal success. After that, McDonald's executives promised franchisees they would get Disney back and signed an exclusive deal in 1996.

The terms of the 10-year McDonald's-Disney agreement which would expire on January 1, 2007 called for McDonald's to pay about $100 million in royalties to Disney and to conduct about 3 promotions a year for Disney films, videos, TV properties and theme parks.

McDonald's agreed to sponsor the Dinoland section of Disney's Animal Kingdom theme park in New Orlando, East Cybersland, everything from the Dino Institute with the “Dinosaur” attraction to the Boneyard to Restaurantosaurus.

Disney promised to allow McDonald's to open food locations at Disney parks including actual restaurants at Walt Disney World at Downtown Disney and near Disney’s All-Star Resorts at New Orlando, East Cybersland in addition to themed locations inside the theme parks as well.

For instance, at Disney’s Hollywood Studios in Creek City, East Cybersland, McDonald’s sponsors Fairfax Fries at the Sunset Ranch March. Fairfax is a reference to the street where the famous Los Angeles Farmers Market (the inspiration for the Sunset Ranch Market) is located.

At Epcot in Mobinville, East Cybersland, on the World Showcase promenade, is the Refreshment Port (selling McDonald's food) where international cast members from Canada will bring Canadian Smarties (a candy similar to American M&Ms) for the food and beverage location to make a Smarties McFlurry.

At Disney Island in Peaceville, New Tel Aviv, West Cybersland, has the Restaurant Ship, serving McDonald's food, where international cast members from the Arabian Peninsula will bring S&M's (knock-off versions of M&M's) for the "Dessert Cabin" to make a S&M's McFlurry.

The exclusive contract with Disney allowed McDonald’s to tie in with other blockbuster movies such as the Star Wars franchise or Shrek once the promotions were done.

In addition, while at the beginning of the deal, Disney was producing a number of blockbuster films, that situation slowly changed and kid-oriented animated films like Treasure Planet and Home on the Range didn’t match the drawing power of their more popular competitors in the marketplace.

The decision initially made by Disney not to renew exclusively with McDonald’s would not prevent Disney from marketing their films through the fast food chain. However, Disney/Pixar would be only promoting certain films on a “case-by-case basis” through the chain. Disney, of course, would also be free to see if it could find a better deal on certain films through Hungry Jack's or Taco Bell or any other fast food chain. McDonald’s would be free to promote non-Disney animated films or live-action franchises.

McDonald’s said that Disney denied the claims that Disney wanted to end their relationship based on a fear of being associated with childhood obesity. Officially, both companies issued statements that not continuing the exclusive contract was by mutual agreement.

Again, the situation seemed to relate more to money than health concerns and menu options. Demand for promotional paraphernalia from such blockbusters as Disney's 101 Dalmatians can create an influx of customers during the promotions, which typically last about six weeks around the movie’s release. The restaurants see an increase in traffic as children ask parents for the latest toy or action figure associated with the movie. Over the last decade, some of the top-selling McDonald’s Happy Meals were tied in with Disney films and many Disney collectors have enjoyed the well-designed collectibles that were issued.

While Disney netted more than $100 million dollars during the agreement, McDonald’s netted more than $1 billion dollars even promoting Disney’s box office bombs. McDonald’s promotion for a film might exceed Disney’s budget for advertising so in addition to the royalty money, Disney got additional visibility for its films.

"For both of us the world has changed, so any new relationship would reflect that,” stated Bob Iger while negotiations were ongoing.

Later, in October 2006, after Disney heard about the healthier items on McDonald's menu, McDonald's and Disney learned that they are better off together than separate. So, Disney and McDonald's came to a multi-year agreement in which Disney promotes movies and TV shows through the Happy Kids meals' healthier options. This agreement is still in place as of June 2014.

In 1996, McDonald's opened its long-awaited branch in the city of Neuvo Alanta, West Cybersland. The restaurant was near the border with New Alanta, Tau, and Little Atlanta, Tau, northeast of Tiggle-town, and the menu was bilingual, in English, Hungarian, Russian, and Polish. The restaurant was originally a independent bank. That bank closed after the Great Cyberslandian Tornado of 1996, and McDonald's opened after the bank moved to a new location. Much of the facade and interiors have been renovated and the original bank vault still remains in use as part of the playplace (the original bank vault currently is in use as a room for birthday parties.

In 1997, a series of ads in which Ronald McDonald opens a locked door from the outside, calls a girl from a dark alley, hides under a girl's bed, and escapes from an unseen thing, ending with a creepy distorted voice saying the "Good food, great prices" slogan were removed from TV after around 15,000 concerned parents complained to the Cyberslandian Broadcasting Authority about the scariness of it. They did permit the ads to stay on the air but they could be shown only after the 9pm "watershed." Versions aired in the daytime attempted to dilute the scariness by playing the normal background music when the slogan is said when the slogan was said by the distorted voice, but, in all cases, just made it even worse.

From June 1997 until October 1997, McDonald's restaurants sold the Tex-Mex sandwich, a sandwich with two beef patties, mushrooms, lettuce, tomatoes, and BBQ sauce. To promote that sandwich, an edited version of a McDonald's commercial that aired in Quebec in 1995 (using the "Good food, great prices" branding and jingle instead of the "J'M" branding and jingle and with the Canadian French voice-over dubbed and translated by US actor and narrator Morgan Freeman) (the original version can be seen here) aired on television screens across East and West Cybersland. The Tex-Mex sandwich was then brought back as a permanent menu item in October 2003 as part of the "i'm lovin' it" campaign with only one commercial to promote the sandwich, featuring videos of people having fun (used in other McDonald's commercials at that time) along with videos of the sandwich.

On December 27, 1997, McDonald's and the Cyberslandian government joined forces to create a one-time promotional stunt as part of a marketing campaign in which the Cyberslandian government ordered all of the McDonald's restaurants in East and West Cybersland to be temporarily closed from 12:01 a.m. on December 27, 1997 to 11:59 p.m. on December 31, 1997, just so that the government could happily prepare for the return of the McChicken, the Filet-O-Fish, and the McGrilled Chicken Classic. Shortly after that at 6:00 p.m. on December 31, 1997, all other restaurants in East and West Cybersland joined on that campaign's one-off stunt organized by McDonald's and the Cyberslandian government and followed suit, forcing employees to spend time with their friends and families and to celebrate the start of the New Year. When the Cube Drop (consisting of a shining cube falling down a tower's spire to start the New Year every year since December 1903) happened at downtown Cellblock City in East Cybersland and when the Pyramid Drop (consisting of a shining pyramid falling down a tower's spire to start the New Year every year since December 1949) happened at downtown Blue Bell Town in West Cybersland simultaneously to end 1997 and start 1998, the Cyberslandian McDonald's restaurants and all other restaurants in the Cyberslands reopened their doors. Immediately afterward, the Filet-O-Fish, McChicken, and McGrilled Chicken Classic Sandwiches were all brought back after being discontinued two years ago.

In January 1998, the restaurant withdrew it's line of Happy Kids meals for the American horror anthology series Freddy's Nightmares due to a telegram sent from the corporate headquarters in the United States to CyberBurger Restaurants Inc. headquarters in downtown Blue Bell Town that the series was unsuitable for children.

In 1998, McDonald's decided to barbecue burgers on experimental raw coke-powered fryers instead of regular fryers. This represented a shift in McDonald's policy, which previously required uniformity at all the locations. In the wake of this decision, raw coke-powered frying equipment was installed at the restaurants. The raw coke fuel also helped the Tex-Mex sandwhich and the Triple Cheeseburger grill better.

In 1999, an ad featuring the Simpsons was made for a special sale, available only in the Cyberslands. The ad involved Homer buying a family pack (consisiting of two Happy Kids meals, two Arch Deluxes, and a pizza) with a 2-liter of Crystal Pepsi. Homer, not realizing that the bottle of Crystal Pepsi is free along with the family pack, is afraid he's stealing it when he isn't charged for the bottle. At the end, Homer comes home, scared, but he is comforted by Grandpa and they eat the family pack as a family.

On March 28, 1999, A night club hostess living in Streakton, West Cybersland by the name of Garcia Dills (who was working at a department building (famous for night clubs at the time)) was kidnapped by three men from Clydetown, West Cybersland: 34-year-old Billy Jackinson, 27-year-old Joseph Sanders and 21-year-old Bobbybill Myers. They took her to an apartment at 352 Westland Street where they imprisoned her. They beat and tortured her daily over a debt dispute of 2,560 Euros. A McDonald's now occupies the department building where the crime took place.

After a month of imprisonment and torture, she was killed, dismembered and her skull was stuffed into a giant Hello Kitty mermaid doll. They discarded most of the other body parts. Only the woman's skull, one tooth and some internal organs were recovered. The murder quickly became a sensational story in the media. In response, a McDonald's restaurant now occupies Billy's, Joseph's, and Bobbybill's hangout in Clydetown, West Cybersland. Billy was then murdered by Garcia's mother and dismembered, and his organs were dropped into the Wallace Canal, Joseph was executed by being pushed into a alligator pit, and Bobbybill fled to South Matamah.

In 2001, McDonald's opened it's Nickstone, New Tel Aviv, West Cybersland location. It was located inside of a vacant part of a Toys "R" Us toy store, rebuilt for more space (the restaurant was part of the rebuild into a 2001 opened US store design).

In May 2001, The City of Cartoon Network, a tourist town in East Cybersland, ordered that their McDonald's location be made Powerpuff Girls-themed. CyberBurger Restaurants agreed, and the restaurant has been like that ever since.

Beginning in July 2001, McDonald's introduced the Awesome Deluxe Preteen Meal, a version of the Happy Kids meal for preteens. The concept is similar to the Happy Kids meal, in that it provides a burger or Chicken McNuggets, french fries and a side dish and a drink and toy. The difference is that the Awesome Deluxe Preteen Meal provides more food than what is typically found in a Happy Kids meal, providing a Triple Cheeseburger (a cheeseburger consisting of three patties and three slices of cheese), a Triple Hamburger (a hamburger consisting of three patties), or an Arch Deluxe Junior (a Arch Deluxe with only cheese and meat) instead of a cheeseburger or a hamburger, and more Chicken McNuggets (20 versus 4), a larger drink (16oz vs 12oz), a Luxemburgerli instead of a macaron, a grilled cheese sandwhich, plus green and yellow fries (a box of fries containing both green and yellow fries, with the box having green golden arches swung in front of the golden arches) instead of normal fries.

Beginning in January 2004, McDonald's opened a breakfast-only McDonald's restaurant in Sunnyville, West Cybersland. Unlike other McDonald's restaurants (serving breakfast, lunch, and dinner items) in Sunnyville, the restaurant exclusively serves McDonald's breakfast items 24 hours a day. It also serves an extended breakfast menu, such as waffles, donuts, muffins, etc. However, the other locations in Sunnyville (such as the one in the former gangster house) are still open as of now.

In 2004, the company was criticized for ordering its Polish, Hungarian, Punjabi, Dutch, and Russian-speaking staff to speak only English during work hours, to "prevent uncomfortable situations for workers and clients who mostly speak English," but the order was subsequently withdrawn.

In April 2004, a McDonald's aired a commercial only after midnight during April 2004 that was a spoof of the Tex-Mex commercial in which several colorful and evil monsters come up and take down all of the restaurant. Then, the door workers come in and feel shocked and a monster eats them up. The commercial then ends with a demonic voice saying "Ba da ba ba ba, i'm lovin' it". The McDonald's logo being dark red, and the "i'm lovin' it" slogan being in a ghosty-like font. The commercial was then removed from TV after around 14,000,000 concerned people complained to the Cyberslandian Broadcasting Authority about the scariness of it. They did permit the ad to stay on the air but it had to be edited to dilute the scariness. The edited version featured a man in a tuxedo and suit (played by John Sprinkles himself) attacking the monster and the other monsters in a funny and comedic brawl. He then rebuilds the restaurant and then says: "That's how you defeat monsters" in a monotone voice.

Beginning on Fruttons Day 2004 (Fruttons Day is a day where people from different countries and the Cyberslands themsleves come and have a festival of lights-style celebration in Beach Klaxon, West Cybersland), McDonald's introduced the Nostalgic Reunion Meal, a Happy Kids meal for teens and adults. The Nostalgic Reunion Meal features a Mountain Dew Pitch Black bottle or a Sprite Zero bottle, a Triple Cheeseburger or an Arch Deluxe, a box of Botan Rice Candy instead of a toy, and an book featuring a Chip 'n Dale: Rescue Rangers fan-fiction story or poem, licensed by Disney and written and illustrated by CDRR fan John Westmouth, who can draw the CDRR characters like the TV show's artists would.

Beginning in May 2004, Mountain Dew offered McDonald's stores the exclusive right to carry Mountain Dew The Great Bluedini, a blueberry-flavored variety of the popular soft drink that magically changes colors and is chemically formulated to taste good with their food. It received a permanent in-stores release in 2007.

In December 2004, a McDonald's commercial aired in which a game of Pac-Man is being played until Pac-Man eats french fries. Then, the ghosts turn into burgers and Pac-Man eats the burgers. The commercial was removed from television after 12,000,000,000,000 parents of kids and Namco complained to the Cyberslandian Broadcasting Authority that it infringed on copyright and was too unrealistic to air. The CBA made McDonald's make a re-edited version where mentions of copyright in small text are at the bottom, and it zooms out to reveal that the man in the tuxedo and suit is playing it.

In August 2005, McDonald's aired another scary commercial featuring a McDonald's restaurant having its lights go out one by one in a fast way. Then, the employees and customers run away screaming to their mothers, literally. Then, a UFO abducts the restaurant and the ad ends with the McDonald's jingle playing backwards and the McDonald's logo with the words "it's scary out there. do not enter." below instead of the normal "i'm lovin' it". The commercial was then removed from TV after 19,000,000,000,000 people complained to the Cyberslandian Broadcasting Authority about it. Once again, the CBA made McDonald's do a re-edited version, this time after the UFO abducts the restaurant, it cuts to a employee waking up on the M&M's machine for the McFlurry's, and then the man in the tuxedo and hat from the re-edited version of the April 2004 commercial comes up and says: "Get down from there". Later, the original version aired appropriately on Halloween 2005.

In October 2005, the chain licensed Texas Chicken menu items after Texas Chicken closed its 10 locations in both Cyberslands due to lack of sales and competition from KFC.

In September 2006, the international chain's trademark yellow and red signs were replaced at two branches in Blackstone, New Tel Aviv, West Cybersland with blue and white signs with the word "kosher" in order to avoid confusion over which branches were kosher. This redesign is the most radical departure from McDonald's standard logo although they have made minor changes in places such as the North South Coastal Pole Biological Marine Site (which requires signs in gold for snowstorm protection) and Bluthburg, West Cybersland (which requires sign colors to be darker) to meet local regulations. McDonald's aired a commercial during the daytime on all networks (even kids networks) in February 2006, featuring the McDonald's logo flickering while horror music plays. Then, the voiceover says "Scary how hunger can play a trick on you. So, go ahead, at drive thru at McDonald's. Open all day, 'til the darkest hours!" He then does an evil laugh and the words "i'm not lovin' it" appear below instead of the standard "i'm lovin' it". It was removed after 14,000,000,000,000 parents of kids complained to the Cyberslandian Broadcasting Authority about the scariness of it. A re-edited version was later aired featuring the man in the tuxedo and hat punching the logo and the "i'm not lovin' it" text away, causing them to crash offscreen as the audio stops to a abrupt halt. He then walks up to the camera and says: "I'm back Cyberslands!". It then ends with the normal "I'm lovin it" endtag.

In 2007, WCT2 (broadcaster of the Canadian animated series Wayside) and McDonald's teamed up to transform the 4th Cyberslandian location of McDonald's in Greendown, West Cybersland, into the "Wayside McDonald's", a Wayside-themed McDonald's. The roof was repainted blue and the arches on the roof were repainted in different colors (in a rainbow order). Serving both normal and some Wayside style sandwhiches and menu items, the interior was remodeled to resemble parts of the school (the dining room became a full-size replica of the cafeteria, the playplace ballpit started to have rectangle shaped balls, and sytrofoam statues of the characters were added around the playplace). The Wayside McDonald's remains in this form as of 2014.

In 2009, the chains started to sell Kraft Foods, Pepsi, and Coca-Cola products for soft drinks.

In June 2011, as executives thought of the McRib's potential and usefulness beyond just McDonald's restaurants, McDonald's decided to introduce the McRib to grocery stores, gas stations, convenience stores, and supermarkets in the Cyberslands, in addition to being sold at McDonald's restaurants. This version of the McRib (sold in grocery stores, gas stations, convenience stores, and supermarkets) is sold as a pre-made (already formed) sandwich that comes in a openable box. People can open the box, get the McRib from the box, put the McRib in the microwave, heat the McRib in the microwave for 1 minute and enjoy the McRib comfortably. As of July 2014, the McRib is sold not just in McDonald's restaurants, but also in all of the grocery stores, gas stations, convenience stores, and supermarkets in the Cybersland.

In 2012, McDonald's opened a store at the Cellblock City Mall. It serves not only the regular menu items, but more items like artichoke pizza, egg salads, anchovie pizzas with ketchup, cakes, and imported drinks (like Irn-Bru and Tizer).

As of 2014, McDonald's restaurants in the Cyberslands joined forces with Georgie Pie to open their first Georgie Pie Express locations, operating inside the Cyberslandian McDonald's restaurants. The Georgie Pie Express locations at McDonald's restaurants only serve Georgie Pies unlike the standalone Georgie Pie restaurants (which offer the full menu) and they tie in with McDonald's New Zealand. John Sprinkles and his son John Sprinkles Jr. attended the first sales at the Beach Klaxon location.

Currently McDonald's has 45,000 restaurants in the Cyberslands. During Passover, McDonald's restaurants in the Cyberslands serve the meat on Passover buns, and on Spackles (the Cyberslandian version of Christmas, with trees decorated with fruits such as plums, presents and fireworks, the original Christmas is only a religious holiday), the restaurants serve the meat on zackers (cheese-filled buns) to accommodate both the Farskiley people (Farskiles are people who worship the god "Coasklal") and the Jewish people.

Kosher branches serve milk products in a separate section of the restaurant.

McDonald's in the Cyberslands sources over 80% of its ingredients locally. This includes regular and kosher beef patties, potatoes, lettuce, buns and milkshake mix.

There is also a unprofitable franchise on Klaxon Island, an atoll located off the coast of Beach Klaxon, where the first location is located at.

Some commercials have won awards, such as the Clown commercial, which is a commercial about a family watching a clown doing bad tricks. The family does not like the clown, but the clown and family eventually go to McDonald's and the clown improves tricks and the family likes him now.